Thursday, 30 April 2009

THE VOTES ARE IN : CATS ALLOWED


Trifle won.

I JUST DON'T KNOW WHAT TO THINK

LASERDISC


I have only watched a Laserdisc once, I watched Blade Runner, and it was absolutely amazing. I was only about ten and it was the first time I had seen the film, so the impressiveness of the Laserdisc experience was probably doubled due to the fact it was Blade Runner....... and Blade Runner is amazing.

I still see huge comparisons between the BLU-RAY VS DVD debate, and the LASERDISC VS VHS wars of yesteryear.
BLU-RAY is still just a better quality dvd, whilst LASERDISCS came with the 12" vinyl sized sleeve. In fact the BLU-RAY logo takes up a quarter of the cases, almost rendering any box art basically pointless.

NIGHT GALLERY INTRO

TOP NICE FRIDAY

Wednesday, 29 April 2009

DO YOU WANT SOME CHEESE WITH THAT SWINE?

I'M GETTING A HAIRCUT ON TUESDAY, SO DON'T WORRY ABOUT THAT!



This boy is crazy wonderful.
Skip to 2:50 for his tips on the internet flirt, believe me it's worth it.

CHERRY PIE AND COFFEE FLAVOUR RUFFLES


VIA Stuffandshit

DENVER INTERNATIONAL AIRPORT



My friend Alex recently put some stuff on his blog about Denver International airport, it is a pretty disturbing place from what I can gather.

COME ON!!! SOME OF THIS TONIGHT!!! AARRGGH FOOTBALL!!!






Patrick Vieira set a great example. We Want Cesc to do the same. Get in their faces! UP THE ARSENAL!!!!!

Tuesday, 28 April 2009

A NEW TONY D

Whenever I look for Tony D videos on youtube this guy always comes up. German rap is such a pleasure:

4Chan @ ROFLcon :-( lols

What's amazing is that even though this is a conference at MIT, the discussion pretty much boils down to the same boring level that it does on a message board.

Monday, 27 April 2009

MOST INFLUENTIAL PERSON OF THE YEAR 2009


4chan is a messageboard in the internet where everyone posts anonymously. It was originally started as a place to discuss Japanese manga comics and films by a 15 year old American school student who posted under the name 'M00t'. What makes it extraordinary is that it developed into a bizarre meeting place for people who just want to fuck everyone's life up in the most hilarious way possible.


Their most recent victim was Time Magazine's internet poll to decide the most influential person of 2009.
The mega-nerds at 4chan invented a special hack that means that they could give thirty votes with one click. The result of this barrage was that 'M00t' became the most influential man of 2009, with Lil' Wayne running close in the lisitings.

http://www.time.com/time/specials/packages/article/0,28804,1883644_1886141,00.html

DANCE LIKE A PRINCE



Charles picks up all the posh skets with his authentic urban flavour

HELLO BILLY!

ARRRGGGHHHHHH!!!!!!!

Sunday, 26 April 2009

Thursday, 23 April 2009

DEER ME!

EURO RAP (SERBIAN EDITION)


"WAYYYN..UH..EEARA..RAAAIIN..WUUULUH..YAAAAAIN"

"LAAPOLEE..DOROTHEEE"

Chris O'real's brilliant documentation (NOODLES) of his Eastern Europe driving trip is the influence for this updated Euro rap discovery.

BANNED GAMES

Thrill Kill for PS1:

"In a release, EA stated that they didn't want to "publish such a senselessly violent game", as they felt that it would harm their image. They also stated that they deemed the game so offensive that they would not even attempt to sell the game to be released by another publisher either. Later, former employees that had worked on the game released the full game onto the internet, along with various beta versions. All are still widely available through filesharing."



Postal 2 for PC:

Postal 2 is more interesting, the violence is not the problem (it is no more violent than GTA), the main reservation people had with it is the amount of choice you are given. You can go through the game without killing anyone, just waiting in queues to get your petition signed or to deliver a parcel. Another option is to go completely bonkers and fuck shit up with a variety of weapons, you can also put a cat on the end of any gun and fire through it for some reason.



I actually agree with this game getting banned (although it is available now), partly because of the mass cat abuse that goes on and also because it actively promotes the option of literally smashing someone's head off with a spade and pissing on them rather than walking past them. I can't imagine anyone trying to emulate "Thrill Kill", that would take considerable effort, but I can imagine someone planning their 'big day' where they are going to 'show everyone who's boss' through "Postal 2".

HE IS SO TURNED ON BY THE GULLET

STRIPPER IMPERSONATORS ARE ALWAYS FUN

Friday, 17 April 2009

I LIKE MEDICAL THEME TUNES

Very Underrated is Casualty's theme tune. Perennially overshadowed by The Bill, I hope more people than Oxide and Neutrino enjoy it. It's like Goblin & John Carpenter mixed with depressing 90's English weather.

ER

Play them at the same time and they sound great!

BELIEVE IN GOD



Fuck god. Yeah I said it. Fuck him. Grrrrr. Kill me you pussy!

Thursday, 16 April 2009

L'AMOUR EAST

L'amour was a musical venue in Brooklyn, New York which opened in 1981 and closed in February 2004. L'amour was commonly known as the "Rock Capitol of Brooklyn." It is commonly pronounced "La-Morz" by patrons. The venue was known as a familiar stomping ground for some of music's biggest, including Metallica, Megadeth, and Kiss. But as familiar as it was for the biggest and best, it was for the up-and-comers. L'amour was never afraid to book over a dozen local acts to open up for a headliner and frequently featured underground bands from across the country and even across the globe.


The original L'amour East, located on Queens Blvd. in Queens (77-00), not only had Rock performers but also was the host of many "Freestyle" acts back in the mid to late 1980s.


Nena not really rocking the crowd at L'amour.
Pretty interesting place, the two (hugely different) musical tastes that co-existed with each other is pretty odd. I can imagine that it would not be the most fun trekking to the place and being confronted by a crowd of metal heads or a flashy mob of freestyle fans.

I HATE LIVE MUSIC


But this is great.

SEEN FRUM MANNYCUN

Tuesday, 14 April 2009

TRIFLE'S GUIDE TO YOUTUBE POOP #1: THE SOURCE MATERIAL

This is a youtube poop:


If you are not interested in it at all, don't read the rest of this post.

I was specifically asked not to post a type of video called 'youtube poop' on this blog.
My next few posts will be a short history of the 'youtube poop' style of video, at no point will I analyze why they are funny or why I like them, I'll just post various different styles and takes on it.

The main source material for youtube poops is based on a series of internet memes, the core two being the incredibly low-budget cutscenes from terrible copyright-breaking games for the most unsuccessful console of all time: the Phillips CD-I.
Here are the original clips:

#1: "Hotel Mario"


#2: Zelda CD-I, "The Faces Of Evil" and "The Wand of Gamalon"


Another bit of source material is the Disastrous "Super Mario Brother's Super Show" which started every episode with a painful live action Mario and Luigi having hilarious japes in their Brooklyn house, a celebrity was always clumsily written into the plot of each of these openings:



There are literally hundreds of other jokes/memes that run in youtube poop (mostly from unsuccessful games, especially ones starring Mario such as "Mario Poker" and "Mario is Missing") but these clips are probably the most important ones to know.

I NEVER GET DOMINOS ANYWAY



the info on the video says:
"This is a great lesson on why you never post something like this on the Internet. These Dominos workers posted this on youtube earlier today (April 13, 2009) It was removed later this day but re-uploaded because these people deserve to be fired. If you want these people fired then Favorite, comment, and rate 5 stars so the word gets out and these people fired."

I think it's more important that they get fired for having tepid cow dung for brains than what they do to the pizza.

Monday, 13 April 2009

THIS MAY BE THE ROWDIEST SONG EVER?



To be heard only when entering the second gate of hell. Satan will be djaying this whilst you wait your turn to be judged.

THE SHAPE OF THINGS THAT HUM - ROLAND TR-808

Inspired by Dougie Ferns' fine post below.

MR. KING OF MUSIC



The man being interviewed is the designer of three musical instruments that changed the sound of music forever, chiefly: the TR-808 & TR-909 drum machines, and the TB-303 synthesizer. He says of the TR-808's now ubiquitous hand-clap sound that he is still not satisfied because it is "light and like fold a bamboo".

Friday, 10 April 2009

"WORKIN' NINE TO FIVE" DOGS


This is too cool not so share, nicked off ENGLISHRUSSIA.

"Russian scientists say that Moscow stray dogs became much smarter. The four legged oldest human’s friends demonstrate real smartness such as riding the Moscow metro every morning to get from their suburban places of living to the fat regions of Moscow center. Once they arrive to the downtown they demonstrate different new, previously unseen for the dog skills. Those skills can include “the hunt for shawarma” for example, the popular among Muscovites eastern cuisine dish. This hunt scene can be seen as this:
Regular Moscow busy street with some small food kiosks. A middle-aged man buys himself a piece of hot fast food and walks aside chewing it without a rush. Then just in a second he jumps up frightened - some doggy has sneaked up on him and barked out loudly. His tasty snack falls out from his hands down to the ground and the dog gets it. Just ten minutes later, on the same place, the teen youngster loses his dinner in exactly the same manner. The modern Russian dogs are on their urban hunt.
The commercial revolution of Moscow made their usual feeding places like trash bins out of direct reach, so they had to get to know new ways of getting their piece of food. That’s how appeared those “Shawarma hunts”. Sometimes though they use more gentle methods. Young girl sits on the bench to eat her hot dog - a big cute looking dog appears from the surrounding bushes and puts her head on her knees. The girl can’t help herself sharing the hotdog with a dog.
Among some more amazing skill those Moscow dogs are the ability not to miss their stop while going on the subway train. Biologists say dogs have very nice sense of time which helps them not to miss their destination. Another skill they have is to cross the road on the green traffic light. “They don’t react on color, but on the picture they see on the traffic light”, Moscow scientist tells. Also they choose often the last or the first metro car - those are less crowded usually.

VERY DIFFERENT STROKES

THE DIRTY ONES

THIS GUY THINKS YOU SUCK

Thursday, 9 April 2009

HAPPY BIRTHDAY VIDEOTIME!

ITS BEEN 2 YEARS SINCE WE POSTED THIS


I think it is due for a re-post.

SLUG DOCTOR

FALCON WITH CAMERA ON HEAD



If you don't like the music, take youtube user alexb00ts' advice:

"just turn down the music and turn on your own tunes. thats what youtubes all about.. remix the hell out of stuff till it suits your. doesnt have to be too high-tech, can be as simple as clicking youtube's speaker icon and opening iTunes =P"

NAMING NAMES

Wednesday, 8 April 2009

UNWATCHABLE MARIO WALKTHROUGH ACCOMPANIED BY JOHN STUART MILL READING



A guy with the username Quadraxis14 made a walkthrough of "Kaizo Mario World" in which he died around once every second (I'm not joking) http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=WzNtm69Y27o

He dies 157 times in this video.

The embedded video is someone reading "On Liberty" by John Stuart Mill over the top of the walkthrough and saying SNES9X every time he dies.

Tuesday, 7 April 2009

XAVIER: RENEGADE ANGEL

Seriously cracking show.

BUGGED OUT BREAKDANCING


I know nobody cares about these old rap clips, but as you might have noticed I do.

The two girls popping to Debbie Deb at breakneck speed, make it a new personal fave.

MY TURN NOW

BOSSES



One boss passed away this week though:


(via fatlace & the meaning of dope)

WHY DOES HE DO THIS TO HIMSELF?



I could imagine it must be quite hard not to bully this kid, I was never a bully as a child... But I remember seeing kids like him get a hard time. The problem was that whilst I knew bullying was wrong, I often did not feel bad for the bullied kid if he behaved like this.
He seems to be a glutton for punishment, the "rage" he gets at the end of the second video seems almost too spot on, in terms of what I remember about kids like him.

Friday, 3 April 2009

KOOL LONDON JEWS

While we are on the subject of interesting London Jews (Sacha Cohen, Trifle, TTR)

I'M LOOKING FOR A LOCHSCMITT

CHOPPS DERBY

WOW WHAT A SHAM (PUNNY?)


MARCH 27--Meet Vince Shlomi. He's probably better known to you as the ShamWow Guy, the ubiquitous television pitchman who has been phenomenally successful peddling absorbent towels and food choppers. Shlomi, 44, was arrested last month on a felony battery charge following a violent confrontation with a prostitute in his South Beach hotel room. According to an arrest affidavit, Shlomi met Sasha Harris, 26, at a Miami Beach nightclub on February 7 and subsequently retired with her to his $750 room at the lavish Setai hotel. Shlomi told cops he paid Harris about $1000 in cash after she "propositioned him for straight sex." Shlomi said that when he kissed Harris, she suddenly "bit his tongue and would not let go." Shlomi then punched Harris several times until she released his tongue. The affidavit, a copy of which you'll find here, notes that during the 4 AM fight Harris sustained facial fractures and lacerations all over her face (she is pictured here in mug shots snapped following busts in 2008 and 2005). After freeing his tongue, a bleeding Shlomi ran to the Setai lobby, where security summoned cops. Harris refused to cooperate with officers, who recovered $930 from her purse. "Both parties had a strong odor of an alcoholic beverage emitting from their persons," police reported. In a brief telephone interview, Harris declined to answer TSG questions about her run-in with Shlomi, though she did say she is considering a lawsuit against the pitchman. Asked if she worked as a hooker, Harris declined comment. As seen in the below mug shot, Shlomi was also injured during the fracas and, court records show, was treated at Mount Sinai Medical Center. While Shlomi and Harris were both arrested for felony aggravated battery, prosecutors this month declined to file formal charges against the combatants. Police records list Shlomi's occupation as "Marketing," but make no mention of his affiliation with the ShamWow or the Slap Chop, both of which sell for $19.95 (plus shipping and handling).

Wednesday, 1 April 2009

PICTURES FOR THE SAKE OF PICTURES


I like the National Geographic theme song, the above video has the full Elmer Bernstein piece, but the song is set to such a bizarre selection of Getty images that I felt I must share it.
Children crying
Swat police
Comedy pictures
Photoshop trick images
Asians in sars masks....the visual stimulus is unending.

LILY ALLEN

NAZI JAZZ



Jazz was banned in Nazi Germany, but Goebbles nurtured one band in particular on the condition that they would broadcast jazz standards with newly written anti-semitic lyrics to Britain. The songs had a huge listenership.

THE WIRE SEASON 6!?

http://vice.typepad.com/vice_magazine/2009/04/breaking-news-the-wire-season-six.html

I THINK ZACK EFRON HATCHED FROM ONE OF THOSE EGGS

STEADY FRED